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I Return . . . Reluctantly Yet Triumphantly . . . to the Internet so you don’t have to 21 Dec 2012 | 10:12 pm

Remember my name So, there I was. Recuperating from a bout of projectile vomiting that had left me weak, dehydrated, and craving those flaming-hot Cheetos. Oh, wait. Hi, y’all! Yeah, I’ve been on a li...

I Left the Room so you don’t have to 3 Aug 2011 | 01:04 am

We gotta get out of this place Soooo . . . it’s been a while. I know. Get over it. Hey, did I ever tell you I used to suffer from panic attacks? NO? Well, no wonder. Panic attacks aren’t very funny....

I Ate a Jordan Almond 24 Apr 2011 | 03:28 am

Do you ever remember me, baby? OK, so a decade has passed since my last post. And that’s the closest thing to an apology you’re gonna get. More to the point, what have I been doing all this time?...

I AM 50 27 Feb 2011 | 09:22 am

Long stem roses are the key to your heart But he needs to start with your head That’s right, SUCKAHS! 50 years of awesomeness, wrapped up in one gorgeous package. You can look all you want, but no ...

I Scammed a Happy Meal 6 Feb 2011 | 05:42 am

Hungry for the meeting The dinner we’ll be eating All this recent talk of mealworms made me remember one of my bucket list entries: Purchase and eat a McDonald’s Happy Meal — without getting caught...

I STILL Do Things (damn it!) 29 Jan 2011 | 04:53 am

I’m back in the saddle again I’m BAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK! Wake up your neighbors, lock up your children, dress up your cats, and start frying the bacon. JD IS BACK (and better than ever? YES, duh!)...

I Was Saved By Firemen 18 Oct 2010 | 01:33 am

You’re poison runnin’ through my veins So I just discovered that there’s this thing called an “alarm” and it gets you out of bed! Oh, STOOPID JD, I can hear you yell. Everyone knows that an alarm cl...

I Punctuate Things . . . REDUX! 10 Oct 2010 | 01:51 am

Hey, everyone! It’s regular ol’ JD here. No, sorry, I do NOT know where Dr. JD or Professor JD are right now. You’re stuck with me. It gets worse. You’re also stuck with an old post, because the onl...

Dr. JD RETURNS to Cure the Sickly People of the Internet 27 Sep 2010 | 03:55 am

And the worms ate into his Head (brain) Hello, and welcome to yet another (FREE!) installation of Dr. JD diagnoses and cures the sickly people of the Internet! My esteemed colleague Professor JD rec...

I Am Alive, Awake, and Scared 19 Sep 2010 | 03:34 am

Why, even the muggers are off The streets by eight Oh, relax, y’all. I’m still alive. Bikram yoga hasn’t killed me yet, tho it is seriously cramping my style. How so? From the Bikram Web site: Yo...

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