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Fisherman’s Friend 27 Aug 2013 | 10:38 am

Slouchy fitting, slubby cotton jumper with round neck and contrast stripe detailing. Ribbed neckline, cuffs and waistband. Drop shoulder. 100% Cotton. Gentle cool handwash. Model is not wearing pants.

Stuffed 26 Aug 2013 | 10:30 am

I’m wearing a shirt today that makes an annoying tapping noise when the buttons hit the keyboard. At least I’m not wearing a stuffed crust pizza bracelet, that would be way more distracting … tap, tap...

Removable parts 23 Aug 2013 | 10:33 am

These sunnies are a little like Mr Potato Head eyebrows, no? Oh the joy of having the odd removable part. Today I’d swap noses and lips. Tomorrow I think I might switch arses. Any takers?

H.E.L.P. 22 Aug 2013 | 09:34 am

Thanks for calling the First World Emergency Hotline: Dial 1 if your gluten free cookie is too big to fit in your glass of organic soy milk Dial 2 if the engraver forgot to include the circumflex on...

Totes manly 20 Aug 2013 | 09:16 am

Dear Michi, my boyfriend is always borrowing my totes. While it’s not exactly cross dressing, I’m concerned this may lead to other things. Please help. Anon. Dear Anon, did you watch that LadyBoy sp...

Wood you mind? 19 Aug 2013 | 09:07 am

How about we stop taking pictures of our fabulous lives for all to see and just start sharing the low moments? That way we can all stop feeling so inept. In the last ten minutes alone I have seen golf...

Am Knot 16 Aug 2013 | 10:01 am

You’re showing off again. Am knot. Yes you are, you’re flashing your back. Am knot. Well can you at least turn around and show me the front of your dress? Can knot. I spilt soup on myself.

Colour wars 14 Aug 2013 | 10:11 am

I just had lunch with my mum and showed her my new, yet to be released book (she’s my mum, she’s allowed to see it). ‘Ooh,’ she said, ‘I love the green cover.’ It’s aqua mum, that’s blue. ‘Well I’m ...

Hot nerds. 13 Aug 2013 | 10:05 am

It’s not true that ‘boys don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses’. I wear glasses and I do alright. I also have a lot of friends who wear glasses and some even have babies so they must have got lu...

Future ready 12 Aug 2013 | 10:28 am

I’ve just been reading about the ‘hyperloop’. If you have no idea what I’m talking about it’s the proposed ‘fifth mode’ of transport … sort of like a really fast train combined with a Dyson vacuum cle...

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