Wendell Gets a Joke 2 Mar 2010 | 09:33 am

Untitled 13 Feb 2010 | 05:52 am

This blog will be going private on Monday, February 15. Thank you to all who have read and commented over the years. If you know me, you can find me on Facebook. I may start a new blog sometime in th...

Conversation With the Asshole Cat 8 Jan 2010 | 02:09 pm

Me: Why do you smell like wood chips? Wendell: Why do you eat your emotions? Cold, feline.

Next to Normal Mashup 17 Dec 2009 | 02:29 am

Sorry, my non-N2N peeps; my brain is possessed. "Didn't I See This Other Movie?" Diana: Didn't I see this movie with Han Solo and ewoks? Produced and distributed by 20th Century Fox Isn't this the o...

A POST THAT WILL MAKE SENSE TO A FEW NEXT TO NORMAL FANS, AND NO ONE ELSE 15 Dec 2009 | 02:45 pm

Then again, when do my posts ever make much sense to anyone? Anyhoo, in honor of Alice Ripley's birthday, I'm going to ghostwrite a memoir, called "She Only Pours the Kashi: The Tragic Tell-All Story...

Several Random Thoughts 14 Dec 2009 | 06:06 pm

I choked on a chicken bone earlier today. It was pretty scary. At first it felt like it was just going down wrong but then I realized it was stuck. I could breathe, but only in between really nasty co...

I Love The Kitty 7 Dec 2009 | 06:18 pm

Another Re-Written Sound of Music Scene 30 Nov 2009 | 01:30 pm

MARIA (sings) . . . When the dog bites When the bee stings When I'm feeling sad I simply remember my favorite things And then I don't feel so bad MARTA: Does it really work? MARIA: Of course it doe...

Those of you without cats can ignore this one. Actually, those of you with cats should probably ignore it, too. 29 Nov 2009 | 03:14 am

Dear Wendell: Just because you didn't see Mommy put the noms in the bowl doesn't mean the noms aren't already in the bowl. You don't need to stand at the bowl and cry. Just eat the fucking food that's...

More Black Friday Fun at Target 28 Nov 2009 | 06:27 pm

Alright, which of these did I do today? (Obviously this is a trick question. . .) 1. Offer my shopping cart to someone who clearly needed one and say, "Don't worry. I don't really need it. I'm just h...