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cloaked 27 Dec 2011 | 03:06 pm

my patients come up with some great lines - ones i never want to forget. sometimes i scribble them in the margins of my other notes. i flip through my notepad now and can see the timeline - the day th...

thanks 28 Nov 2011 | 07:17 am

i'm sure every year i write about it - about the beautiful hideousness that is oncology at the holidays. in the past, i'm sure i've used words like poignant. this year i think i'll use sucks - infinit...

silence 23 May 2011 | 03:32 am

my advice? keep a dustpan in your bag - some days it's all about cleaning up messes, many of which you didn't make yourself. the worst is this one: MD: i know you're seeing Mr.S later - just wanted y...

gloss 13 Apr 2011 | 11:00 pm

he: hey, so...remember the budget? me: yeah, i know. well i had to buy those fresh flowers and the lip gloss and that book and that bottle of limoncello...because my patient died. he: ....and she left...

beloved 5 Mar 2011 | 07:16 am

witnessing the spouses with their deep sighs and soft caresses and tired eyes and interminable sadness the day after day after day slog of chemotherapy and side effects and wheelchairs and weakness ...

today 19 Feb 2011 | 07:10 am

it's always insidious. that ember of sadness that has lived in me as long as i can remember gets fanned by one thing or another and a slow burn ensues. it's subtle, even undetectable to most, and grat...

question 16 Feb 2011 | 08:16 am

just in case i haven't made this perfectly clear here on this blog, this is difficult work. to care for people, to watch suffering, to be unable to prevent terrible things, to bring bad news, to watch...

hope 17 Jan 2011 | 09:28 am

hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul ... emily dickinson ...and in the pleading eyes of your patient that look to you to make something positive out of their bleak circumstances. ...

surprise 18 Sep 2010 | 08:43 am

there is prognosis and data. there is following all the recommendations. there is following none of the recommendations. there is prayer and attitude and hope. then there is luck. the unpredicatble na...

another 3 Sep 2010 | 02:34 pm

when the words come across your computer screen that he died the one who could have been my husband or your brother or our friend do you feel it too? the...oh god.... or is it...oh God... it's not 'w...

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