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Terminal Lance #289 “Why We Drink” 27 Aug 2013 | 12:45 pm
Marines are synonymous with alcohol, much in the same way your abusive step father is. I’ve brought this up before, but I never really mentioned why we drink so much. It really just comes down to the...
Buddyfucker Jesus 25 Aug 2013 | 09:50 pm
So I posted this image on the Facebook page: Naturally it caused quite the disturbance in the force for faux Christians who might have assumed that all Marines are warriors of God. This image isn’t a...
Terminal Lance #288 “GoPro” 24 Aug 2013 | 12:30 am
The allure of the combat deployment is always enticing, and oftentimes disappointing in its return of investment. What is it you’re investing? Emotional stock, mostly. While one is always grateful for...
Terminal Lance #287 “Grizzled” 20 Aug 2013 | 12:01 pm
You really don’t see many white guys with a “no-shave chit” walking around. You will, however, encounter the unshaven black guy quite often. Despite my excessively large penis, I’m not as black as peo...
Terminal Lance #286 “Duty II” 16 Aug 2013 | 11:45 am
There’s simultaneously so much and absolutely nothing to be said about the misery of duty. A Marine on duty has no friends. I could go on and on about how boring duty is, but you already know. At th...
Terminal Lance #285 “Questionable Advice” 14 Aug 2013 | 04:22 am
Your senior Lance Corporals are great training resources. They might seem like assholes, and they probably are, but they ultimately have your best interests in mind and give you advice for the better ...
Terminal Lance “Manhunt” 10 Aug 2013 | 02:06 am
It’s true, they’re finally going after the culprit that claims hundreds of thousands of buttholes every year. The Green Weenie strikes hard and it strikes fast, eluding even the most honest of Staff a...
Terminal Lance #284 “Gear Accountability” 7 Aug 2013 | 12:24 am
Boots do amazing things. They aren’t particularly positive in their implications, but they do amazing things nonetheless. When I was at SOI, I remember seeing my “libo-buddy” lose his flak jacket on a...
Terminal Lance #283 “Mine-Resistant, Ambush-Protected” 2 Aug 2013 | 12:01 pm
Driving an MRAP sucks. What sucks even more is trying to explain to civilians what an MRAP is. Everyone knows the infamous “humvee,” but then you’re like, “Yeah I was a turret gunner in an MRAP,” and ...
Terminal Lance #282 “Size Matters” 31 Jul 2013 | 12:50 am
Is it just me or does no one actually know what size blouse they’re supposed to wear? Pretty much everyone you talk to buys a medium-reg, because it’s the medium, regular choice; but there are actuall...