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Do I have to stop making Checkpoint Charlie jokes just because Checkpoint Charlie hasn’t... 4 Jan 2013 | 02:17 am

Do I have to stop making Checkpoint Charlie jokes just because Checkpoint Charlie hasn’t existed in over 20 years?

Nothing like reading two notices of your own death. Except for reading a notice of your own death. 3 Jan 2013 | 07:17 am

Not my death exactly, but Joe Schmitt’s death. And another Joe Schmitt’s death. Thanks to Google Alerts on “joe schmitt” I know that 2 different Joseph Schmitts have died in the Chicago area in the l...

"Root for the Packers? And for what? So I can watch the Bears offensive line meltdown next week in..." 31 Dec 2012 | 04:51 am

“Root for the Packers? And for what? So I can watch the Bears offensive line meltdown next week in the playoffs?”

teapartycat: NRA: “It’s too soon to talk about reindeer... 28 Dec 2012 | 01:51 am

teapartycat: NRA: “It’s too soon to talk about reindeer control.” Reindeer control is the most important issue facing our great nation. Call your congressman today.

"Forget the Naughty List— if Santa only brought presents to kids who brushed and flossed that..." 24 Dec 2012 | 07:24 am

“Forget the Naughty List— if Santa only brought presents to kids who brushed and flossed that night, he’d be done in 10 minutes.”

"I had to cut through the perfume floor of Macy’s, so now I won’t be able to taste food..." 16 Dec 2012 | 08:29 am

“I had to cut through the perfume floor of Macy’s, so now I won’t be able to taste food for a week.”

"I called 9-1-1, but they told me that Paul McCartney replacing Kurt Cobain in Nirvana is not a hate..." 12 Dec 2012 | 10:14 pm

“I called 9-1-1, but they told me that Paul McCartney replacing Kurt Cobain in Nirvana is not a hate crime and to stop calling.”

Rex Huppke's "Obituary For Facts" named to Time's Top 10 Opinions of 2012 6 Dec 2012 | 07:00 am

Rex Huppke's "Obituary For Facts" named to Time's Top 10 Opinions of 2012: But since facts are dead, this could just be made up.

Get it together, ad writers! 30 Nov 2012 | 07:00 am

From my friend Chris: I saw an ad for United that says “We’re going places. More than 370 to be exact.” Ummmmmmmmmmmm how is that exact? That’s like making a cake with a recipe that says “Add some eg...

"No, Facebook, I don’t want to pay you to make sure my friends see this post, and I never will,..." 17 Nov 2012 | 04:31 am

“No, Facebook, I don’t want to pay you to make sure my friends see this post, and I never will, so please stop asking.”

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